It Wasn't Anger, It Was Grief
Jesus, Martha, Mary, and the Weight of Grief
I recently rediscovered the story of Jesus, Martha, and Mary after the death of Lazarus in John 11.
Martha's grief moves her to action.
When she hears that Jesus is coming, she walks out to meet him. After talking with Jesus she goes back to Mary, and tells her he's there calling for her. Mary gets up “quickly” and goes to meet Jesus. He hadn’t moved, he was still in the same place as when he met Martha.1
Jesus witnesses Mary's tears and is “deeply disturbed and troubled” (John 11:33, CEB). Other versions say “deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled” (ESV)2; “greatly disturbed in spirit, and deeply moved” (NRSV); “his heart was touched, and he was deeply moved (GNT); “a deep anguish began to well up inside him, and he was troubled in spirit” (FNVNT).3
Jesus cries with her, joining the people who followed her and are crying with her.
I find it interesting that we often read anger into this passage. Some Bible translations include the word anger, which perhaps doesn’t help.
Martha confronted. Mary demanded.
“Where were you?! Why weren’t you here?!”
Yet, the text says nothing about anger, confrontation, or demanding.
I used to envision Martha, storming out of the house, stomping up to Jesus, pointer finger jabbed directly in his face. “If you’d been here!” she accuses heatedly.
Or Mary, not wanting to see Jesus because he let her down. Only going because he asked her to, not because she wanted to. Falling at his feet, not wanting to look him in the eye. “Are we not important to you?” she utters.
Anger. Defiance. Demand.
Maybe that was the case, but I wonder… What if we looked through a different lens?
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